Witless Minions 4-Eva
Volume 3 Story 9
Preceded by
Mysterious Dumbass
Followed by
With Great Hotness


Two years before the present, an Armored Villain grasps Q-Dog by the throat and threatens to kill him for losing his microwave-frequency laser cannon. Thugboy then shoots the villain in the back, destroying his suit's cooling vents. Thugboy reveals that they stole the cannon and sold it to a supervillain wannabe, then he and the other Witless Minions rob the lair while the armored villain suffocates. Later, the Witless Minions are working for the supervillain Icy Mike, who intends to kill fifty thousand people with a Cryobomb. Thugboy beats him to death with an icicle. Q-Dog asks if Thugboy was involved in the capekilling in San Antonio. Thugboy has a flashback to being a member of the San Antonio Capekillers under the Holy Avenger, but denies it to Q-Dog. The story then flash-forwards to the Witless Minions getting killed by Willy Pete. Thugboy survives by freezing him with one of Icy Mike's cryoguns. He shoots Willy Pete in the head three times, but fails to kill him, and barely manages to escape. Thugboy is subsequently thrown into an apathetic depression until he meets Empowered, who becomes his lifeline.

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